A Moment Of Prayers...

Dear Friends,

Today I received one of the worst news of my life. My dad is in the hospital at this moment. The doctor called me today to break the news of his scope results. They found growths (polyps) in his colon. From all their preliminary findings, it suggests that it is likely cancer. More conclusive tests are now being carried out. I really didn't know how to react to the news. I know how cruel colon cancer can be (been there.. survived it).. It is a painful torture leading to death for those that could not live to tell. My dad is 79 yrs old with cardio and diabetic complications. There is no way that he could possibly survive a surgical procedure.

My dad is a man with extraordinary will. Nothing had ever conquered him (I probably inherited a little of our "bu-dao weng" traits). He had already survived 5 cardio surgeries. Endured more than 15 years of pain in being a diabetic. And not to mention, 40 years of hatred from the woman that he loved dearly.

When the doctor broke the news to us, I could see (for the first time) the fear in his eyes. But still, he fought on to ask the doctor in a trembling voice, "so how much time do I have"... I just could not keep my tears from falling when I heard that... I felt the urge to shout out, "GOD! LET IT BE ME! LET IT BE ME!"... and I really mean it... If I could I would rather take his place.

But dad quickly composed himself and said, "it's ok, son.. it's time, anyway". I tried to dismiss his resignation. I asked him what happen to the man that taught me, "there's nothing that we can't overcome"? I told him that he had fought death 5 times. He could do it again.

He just smiled and said, "It's enough. I think this will be my final penance to pay for all my sins... I just pray that God will not make this final penance too painful to serve".

The only thing he wanted me to do for him is to carry on his torch to love and take good care of mom while he's gone.. And for those of you who know my family well, this responsibility to keep the torch's flame burning is no easy feat.

Mom had loved and hated him for more than 40 yrs. She loves him so much to endure the pains he caused her but at the same time, she couldn't bring herself to truly forgive him. Hopefully, now she could really let it go... Honestly, I haven't the slightest clue on how to break the news to her yet.

It is really an irony. I had always been his prodigal son and I had been angry with him for almost all my life (until recent years). But I was the only one by his side when the news was broken (my two brothers are overseas). I'm glad we made that reconciliation (thanks to Ting) and caught up a little on all those lost years. I just wished mom had done the same.

Pray for us, guys... we need a miracle now...

The Phantom.