2001 X'mas Wish...

Hi Frenz,

Hope that all of you are enjoying this x'mas and feeling the spirit of x'mas. I had been having so much fun for the past week or so. I've not only been out meeting old friends that I've not met for ages, but also building new bonds with new friends as well. And with the year drawing to a close in just a few days, its abt time that I start to reflect on the entire year.

This year hasn't been a good one for me. I've lost a few very close friends... had tones of domestic problems... cheated death twice... and had been left out in the wild to nurse my wounds in solitude for a while... The journey had been a long and painful one. I was so down that I could only make my way forward painfully inch by inch.. I had my flesh torn off piece by piece with each obstacle that I cross.

My whole world was torn apart since my business failed. I'm now almost a bankrupt with a long string of debts to repay. All that I had and owned were seized by my creditors (my car, my apartment, everything)... I have no job (my bankruptcy proceedings cost me my job). I had been in and out of the hospital because of two very major operations that almost killed me. My wife left me for another man and I was left with nothing but to fight the most bitter lawsuit of my life all for the custody of Iggi... Some of my closest friends shun me... And there were juz times that I just don't wanna go on anymore. I was all lorn, worn and weak.

Even when I saw the light at the end of the tunnel, I wasn't even sure if I was gonna make it. But I didn't care and just went on digging and digging. It was only when I caught a glimpse of what I saw at the end of the tunnel that really kept me going. And you know what that was???. It was you guys. You guys (friends, relatives and Iggi) that had been nudging me on all these while... waiting at the other end of the tunnel to greet me and welcome me home.

The journey is far from over. But it was nice to know that even in my darkest, loneliest, moments of my life, my "tunnel of darkness", that you guys were with me all those times... waiting anxiously to greet me at the end of it. I know that this is one journey that I've got go thru it alone and I'm just glad that all you guys will be there at the end of it... ready to embrace me with your love when I get there.

Now there's only one thing left for me to do before I embark on my journey again. It is to reconcile with those whom I've hurt along the way. So hey... (if you guys are still reading my stuff from here), I'm saying what i find hardest to say... "SORRY". I know. It'll mean a whole lot more sincere if I'd said it to you personally... And I will... soon... one day... but wait lah. ..Let me gather enough guts first lah. .. OK??

Now as I unwrapped all those x'mas gifts, read all those greeting cards, emails, sms, etc. I felt the love, the bonding, the warmth of friendly hearts radiating thru them.. Guys, u're the greatest gift that God had ever gave me.

THANKS.
(KPNN-Personal)