I can't tell you how much I appreciate you guys mustering behind me in support. You guys are great.
Today is a very painful day for me. My ex-wife insisted that I can only see Iggi on supervised access even though the Court had rejected her application for Iggi's PPO against me. [erm... for the benefit of those who's not aware of what happened, Charon and I had a big fight coz she didn't allowed me to see Iggi... In a fit of fury, I smashed her window]. Will be in Court on Monday, 19 April 2003, again to address this issue.
Meanwhile, she only agreed to grant me supervised access at the Tanjong Pagar FSC today between 11am to 12pm. However, she only showed up at 11:35am. As the Tanjong Pagar FSC already had a prior booking for the use of that same room from 12pm onwards, my access was forced by such circumstances to end at 12pm. I was, yet again, shortchanged.
During the access, that Iggy behaved very hostile and rude towards me (not like him to do that at all). I reprimanded Iggy for his disrespectful and rude behaviour as I felt that Iggy’s conduct warrants discipline. I love him but I won't spoil him lor. I asked him if that was what he was taught and he claimed that his teacher in school had told him to do so. I then told Iggy that I will go to his school on Monday to confront his teacher to confirm that. It was only then, that he admitted that it was not the teacher that taught him that but someone else. He refused to mentioned whom that someone is but we can all guess who that may be. Who else is close enough that had the most amount of time with Iggy and whom are in the most favourable position to influence Iggy to behave in such manner. I didn’t continue to pressure Iggy to admit that it was her that had taught him all that because my time with was already very limited. Also, I didn’t want to make things any harder for Iggy.
My ex-wife's conduct is unacceptable and her ability of bringing up Iggy with correct values are now highly questionable. Even though there are disputes between us, teaching a child to be rebellious and disrespectful to his father is not what any prudent or responsible parent would do. Iggy’s coping with our divorce and custody is already hard enough on the kid, the least that we can do (as a responsible parent) is to spare Iggy from being torn to show loyalty to one parent more than the other.
So, after a very brief reprimanding of Iggy (about 2-3 minutes in the presence of the supervising welfare officer), I went on to explain to him why his conduct was wrong. I reminded him that we (the school, the church and me) had always taught him to be respectful towards his elders and he had learnt well in the past, so I asked him not to lose all that he had learnt. I cited Darth Vader (one of the villain characters in one of Iggi’s favourite movie “Star Wars”) as an example. In that movie, Darth Vader used to be a good "jedi". He was manipulated and was made to turn to his dark side because of his weakness towards greed, temptation, hatred and anger. I then asked him if he wanted to end up like Darth Vader. He was remorseful. Thank God.
I told him that in life, he should not be influenced by people. That he should know distinctly what is right and what is wrong. I ended that issue with a new prayer I taught him (he remembers all those prayers I taught him). I told him to pray for God’s help to give him strength, courage and wisdom whenever he felt weak, troubled or unhappy. I re-assured him that I love him and will always be there if ever he felt that way. I told him to call me (yes, he still remembers my phone number by heart) if he ever feels sad. But what I didn’t tell him was, that his mommy will do just about anything to stop me from seeing him. That access session ended as that. There was no time for anything else.
After the supervised access, I stayed for a while to discuss some issues with the welfare officer supervising the access. When I left the Tanjong Pagar FSC, that woman and her new husband.. erm... they got married on 3 April 2003... can't see how anyone can still go thru a wedding amidst all these lawsuits.. goes to show how much she "loves" Iggy... anyway, she and her hubby waited for me downstairs and as I was about to leave the building, they confronted me.
She asked me why did I tell Iggy that she’s bad (obviously from her senseless interrogation of Iggy after my session of access with him.. without sparing a thought about how Iggy felt). Her allegations were baseless and I denied saying that. The access was conducted under the supervision a welfare officer and the truth can easily be established. I refused to go along with the confrontation any further and I walked away peaceably.
While walking away, both she and her new hubby hurled verbal insults and provocations at me. She was raising her voice behind me like a mad dog and her new hubby was saying to me as I passed him in front of my son that “you’re such a useless old man”. My reaction to his crude provocation was cool... I just to shrug my shoulders and walked right on by. Nonetheless, their conduct were downright appalling.
As she has a PPO against me (yup she got the PPO but the Court rejected Iggi's), I didn’t want to give her any more grounds to make my life any worse than the living hell that it already is. I had to swallow those insults made by them and walked away (but then, what's new anyway?).
Knowing that she will lie through her teeth to deny this in Court, I went back (after buying my newspaper from the 7-Eleven Store nearby) to the few shops within proximity to where the provocation took place to ask if anybody witnessed it. And yes, two shop owners witnessed it. I shared with them a little background of my story and they concurred that I did the right thing by walking away.
I will bring this matter to Court on Monday. Let's pray for me that justice shall prevail..
(KPNN-Gossips)
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