Iggi's Home-Coming...

Yes.. Finally, Iggi will be coming back to Singapore today and I will be able to spend 2 weeks or so with him..

As I was cleaning up the house and getting his room ready for him.. all the pain of losing Iggi's custody fight came flashing vividly through my mind.. Though the wound may seem to have healed, somehow the pain was still there.. I guess it is not easy getting over a loss of someone so dear in our hearts..

You may say, "Come on".. but it is really not easy dealing with the hurt no matter how hard you try to move on.. Its been 3 yrs and the pain is still as sore as if it was just yesterday.. That's when I know what those people meant at the 9-11 memorial that "the pain will be forever"..

I quickly dry my teary eyes and try to put those hurtful thoughts away.. I told myself, "hey, let's look at how we can make this coming 2 weeks, the best times of our lives for Iggi & me".. I started planning what we're gonna do, what we're gonna eat, who we're gonna visit.. I put on some upbeat R&B to perk me up a little.. And soon, those sorrowful moments just seem to fade a little.. like magic..

You see.. that's what a positive mind can do.. I feel so much better now.. No one and nothing can change the painful past.. it will never go away and those solemn moments will always come back to haunt us from time to time.. no matter how many times you find closures for them.. no matter how many times you managed to put them away.. And when it does come back (as it did earlier).. it is how we deal with it that really matters.. you can choose to willow in self pity and feel down or.. snap out of it quickly by focusing on things that will shape the future or the happiness of the ones you love instead..

Imagine this.. if I had continue to feel sorry and angry, will it not affect the quality of the times that I'm gonna spend with Iggi for the next 2 weeks? I've made that wise choice of focusing on how to make the next 2 weeks the best times of my life instead and I'm really looking forward to it...

So now.. as I lay the new sheets for Iggi's bed, the sweet thought of my boy lying there.. appreciating those crisp, clean sheets sure beats those ugly thoughts of those painful moments of losing the custody of my boy..

Sure.. I'm certain that those painful moments will come back to haunt me again one day.. but I know how to deal with it now.. I can't tell you what a nice feeling that it is to be able to open up a book of sorrows and close it with a smile to move on..

The Phantom
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